--- Gerald Jordan <starfire@brainerd.net> wrote:

 High above Earth a starship leaving with some cargo and
passangers. The cargo is a mix, some food, music CD's, movies and
anime DVD's, some arts, some furniture. The passangers are 4
teenagers, a college student, and a mother. All are watching as the
Earth fades away. A new life is about to start for all of them.

Is English your first language?  I notice quite a few grammar and
usage problems that make it difficult to read this.

Also, this prologue is very generic.  How do the various governments
of Earth feel about the aliens?  Are the teenagers all from one
place?  Is this meant to be comedy, action, soap opera?

You may want to scrap this prologue altogether and fold the pertinent
information into the first chapter.


For what it's worth,
SKJAM!

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