First, I agree with Dave. Akane was handled poorly
in this fic from the
getgo. Yes, she is hard headed, judgemental, and
leaps to the wrong
clonclusion about Ranma frequently in the Manga, but
as has been pointed out
many times, she is not the mallet happy "I gotta
make Ranma's life hell"
biotch that many fan fic authors fall into the trap
of representing her as.

Mallet-happy? "I've gotta make Ranma's life Hell"?

Are we talking about the same fic I wrote here?

Please, where the heck did you get that idea from what
I wrote? Please, show me this "Evil Akane" I allegedly
placed in here.

I actually went over it again to see if you two had
anything to your claims, but as far as I can tell you
just appear to have skimmed the lines and made your
own judgements.

However, in this fic, she exhibits many of the "bad"
fan-fic akaneisms that
just aren't found in the manga.

Again, where?

However, giving the amount of trouble that Ranma has
weathered in the past,
it's hard to picture anything being bad enough to
FORCE him to leave,

Force him to leave?

Er, he's running away from a problem that has nothing
to do with martial arts. Its something he and Genma
do.

a result I think that the author would be better
served going for a "softer"
introduction of Ranma into the LH storyline,
bringing him in as one of the
orbital characters who circle the main story of
Keitaro and Naru. 

Why? That would sorta invalidate the whole point of
the premise, wouldn't it? Focusing solely on "promised
couples", isn't my thing. I'm trying something
different.

example. Ranma's mother and Haruka-san (aunt Haruka
from LH) could be
sisters and hence she hears about how the Granny
Hina needs a manager for
the Hinata-sou.... (Managing an all girl dorm while
Newphew Keitaro is
away?... Why it's just the perfect job for my manly
son.)

....

And like that idea HASN'T been done to death already?

 

Now onto the major issues I have with this fic.

First off... I am A-okay with crossovers, provided
the author first, takes
the time to do the work needed... and second, makes
the effort to maintain
the spirit of the worlds that they are crossing
over. Simply put I find this
fic disturbingly lacking in a number of areas. First
off... killing off
Grandma Hina like that set off alarm bells and
whistles immediately. 

....

Grandma Hina was a Deus Ex Machina plot device used
sparingly in the Manga by Ken Akamatsu, and yet why do
people keep telling me "You can't kill Grandma Hina,
she's a major character!"

Yes, in the original Love Hina universe she makes some
waves, but this ISN'T the Original Love Hina Universe.

It's a

sign that the author is doing one of two things...
either he or she is
cleverly tricking the character (Granny isn't dead,
she just sent you a copy
of the will to look over, Ranma-kun. She wants
everyone to know what they
are getting when she passes on and wants to make
sure you're okay with it.)
into coming there, or they don't have the skill to
write the fic with that
character involved... and therefore took the
easy-way (read; lazy) out, and
just kills off the character rather than put forth
the effort to deal with
them. 

Or C. That death is part of the whole story plot.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/false-dilemma.html

Please, consult this site before making any more
fallacies.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies

 I hope it proves that the author is being

cleve, not lazy... but the
mishandling of Akane puts me in mind that it's more
the later than the
former.

And again.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies

Next, IMO casting Ranma in the role filled by
Keitaro is a BIG mistake.
Their personalities are simply too different for
Ranma to fill his shoes
properly. 

And who said I wanted Ranma to be Keitaro? 

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/straw-man.html

Now, I may be waving a lightnign rod in a
thunderstorm in saying
this... seeing as how there are many die hard Ranma
fans out there...
but,Keitaro is heads and shoulders a better man than
Ranma has EVER shown
himself to be, and it's his heart that makes him
what he is... which is
something Ranma is just not suited to match.

Sigh, and again.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies

 

Keitaro taught the women of Hinata-sou dorm a number
of very important
lessons that I don't think that Ranma could teach
since he doesn't "walk the
walk" like Kietaro does. Kei , for example, taught
Mokoto about how love for
others was the key to unlocking her own strength
(Something Ranma could
NEVER EVER DO because he can't even begin to deal
with his feelings for
Akane in the first place) He helped Naru deal with
her failures, being there
as a supportive friend, and offering a tender
shoulder when it was needed.
Even shinobu ended up becoming more open during the
series because of the
love and respect that he gave her, inspiring her and
Mokoto both to try for
Toudai later on. Plus, Keitaro fills a number of
roles that Ranma simply
doesn't have the maturity of self to manage in how
the story of Love Hina
developed. Where Ranma harasses and insults, Keitaro
is the polar opposite,
he encourages and praises others out a a genuine
caring about the other
person. Where Ranma is all about dodging
comittments, Keitaro is all about
making them and carrying through on them no matter
what. Unless Keitaro is
in this fic giving a counterpoint to Ranma's
immaturity and bluster...there
is a serious danger of this fic just being a
collection of the less funny
and risque slapstick  bits that LH was otherwise...
which I'd have a real
hard time seeing happen in the first place... given
how coordinated Ranma
is. Keitaro's biggest fault is that he's a klutz
with bad luck, he has a
tendancy to trip, fall, and flip up girls skirts
while so doing, basically
giving the artist reasons to draw the female
characters in underwear and so
that the females will overreact and boot him into
orbit,

 
And I can't let Ranma fill different roles
because....?

Also, frankly, Kei's drive to get into Toudai (tokyo
university) isn't
something that I think Ranma could or would
understand. 

Never Assume. It makes an Ass out of U and Me.

For this fic I see no need to have Granny Hina die
just to have Ranma end up there...and in fact I found

this to be a heavy handed Deus Ex Machina,

And the original Grandma's fax is not heavy handed
Deus Ex Machina because....?

Granny Hina should be kept around for the same reason

she was in the LH manga and anime.

There it is again, what is this "You can't kill
Grandma Hina" bias I keep runnning into?

to be the hidden force that could be brought in to 
settle all disputes, and to manipulate things from 
the background.

Were you saying something about Deus Ex Machina? 

For example this whole "Ranma leaves to go to Love 
Hina" scene could be taking place right after Keitaro

broke his leg after getting accepted into Toudai, and

Granny Hina has decided to trick or recruit Ranma to 
help manage the place while Keitaro is recovering. 

Lovely idea, you should write it yourself.

Or perhaps it's at the end of the series, after 
Narusegawa and Keitaro leave on their honeymoon... 
and again the Hinata-sou needs a manager for a while.

Again, if you like that idea, feel free to write it
yourself.

with the added benefit of not putting the readers 
through the pain of an oh so contrived  Naru/Ranma 
romance. I mean, come on, Ranma has never shown any 
romantic inclinations whatsoever toward anyone 
really so far, and if we end up going down that path 
in this fic... then having him get all excited over 
some girl from a childhood memory, when he showed 
none of those inclinations toward Ukyou would simply 
not fly with me.

Contrived Naru/Ranma romance? Where?

Based on one grope in the hot springs? Where was Ranma
getting romantic? 

Based on a dream where he's not the one making the
promise (and that he can't remember)? Er, I am not a
manga writer, I am not restricted into the matchups
set by the original series. 

Please, if you have questions about the plot, ASK.

Don't just start shoving all these "You're going to do
this and that" when you don't know where the plot is
going.

-Shade

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