I have to say this story is awfully intriguing.  But one thing bothers me 
about this chapter. (continuing from the last one.)

This Leviathan Spring is a submarine correct?  (Even if it sounds like it's 
as big as an aircraft carrier...)  So with all the damage and fire why 
isn't this thing sinking like the Titanic?  Even if they are still 
surfaced, fire is a catastrophic danger, (Asphyxiation, hull rupture, 
toxicosis, severe burns, drowning, etc and if there is an armory...thats 
instant watery tomb right there.) even more so than on a normal ship.  So 
it just seems weird that most of the characters are almost ignoring the #1 
things that could kill them and are blundering about like headless chicken, 
changing their minds on what to do and where to go every 5 
minutes.  Granted you've got all the clones running about killing everyone 
they meet, but still some indication that people were trying to fight the 
fires or just abandoning ship would help the story out of B movie cliche' 
land.   (aka "There's a killer in the woods.  Let's split up and look for 
him.")


At 01:36 PM 12/20/2003 +1300, you wrote:

First draft of the next chapter.  Late, with my apologies.  Please 
enjoy.  C&C is as always welcome and appreciated.

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