Suggested changes: {before : after}
On Sat, 20 Dec 2003 12:23:26 -0500 DB Sommer <sommer@3rdm.net> wrote:
Ranma rose to his feet, retreating toward the door to {: the} backyard. "I just
remembered, I've got to fight Ryouga today. He gets lonely if he doesn't get
angry with me at some point during the week. Bye." The moment he cleared the
threshold, he bolted through the yard and over the wall.
He could always try to catch the CLAP, or some of them at least. He should
be okay as long as he remembers to wear his galoshes. Did Nodoka ever get
him those rubbers she was considering?
Rather than act intimidated, Kachiko laughed. "If you're so hot and bothered
about controlling who he should and shouldn't date, why don't you ask him
out? Get him wrapped around your finger and you won't have to worry about a
thing. I've done it to lots of guys. Like... like... umm, like...."
Like Yumi?
With it being dinnertime, and gut instinct telling him it would be best to
not be at home for a while, Ranma had opted to eat at the restaurant nearest
to the direction he had headed {of in : off in :}: Ucchan's. As he had expected, the food
was good and the service prompt as Ukyou reserved most of her attention for
him. It made for a pleasing eating experience.
"WHAT?!" Kachiko shrieked. "When I told her to ask him out on a date, I
didn't mean she should actually ask him out! She was supposed to get angry
at the implication she likes him and stomp off, growling she doesn't care
about him, like people like her always do! Actually asking him out goes
against everything Nabiki told me she's done before! I can't believe she
outmaneuvered me like this!"
The nerve of Akane, doing what she was told! Though she didn't exactly ask.
Kasumi pondered that one. She began counting the number of places one at a
time. "Well, there's the grocers. The fish market. Sometimes I go to Dr.
Tofu, he's a local doctor, and borrow books from him. Oh yes, and on the far
side of town, there's this Museum of Cookware--"
What a wild-woman.
Kasumi smiled at her mother and the willingness she showed to go out of her
way to help her oldest daughter, even if Kasumi was uncertain of what she
needed 'saving' from.
Which is part of the point.
"It's to give the guys some eye candy, something you'd never {be considered : consider}
with those cellulite-laden thighs of yours," Kachiko stated as she strolled
down the stairs, still in the clothing she had been wearing earlier.
"Stop that this instant!" Nodoka ordered, making the animal wince. "I'm
being serious. I need to know: am I boring and frumpy? And don't tell me
what I want to hear. I demand you answer honestly."
I don't know any man with an ounce of sense who'd want to answer that honestly.
Even Genma is very nervous about answering.
In forcing the issue, Akane's asking Ranma out had resulted in the two of
them having a wonderful time at the local amusement park. Riding side by
side on the attractions, eating the various unhealthy foods offered at the
park, and reveling in each other's company without the interference of
others, had served to lighten Akane's mood more than any {other : time} in recent
memory. Once she thought about it, she hadn't had Ranma truly to herself
since her mother's return. While events had always been active in their
lives before, things had turned frantic with Kachiko living under the same
roof {as them :}. Between the issues the various members of the family had with
her, in connection with the girl's own outrageous behavior, there was rarely
a moment of peace to be found.
Now an oasis in the chaos had been discovered. It was such a blessing to
have Ranma all to herself, Akane mused. It would have been nicer if Ranma
had been the one initiating things, but of late, it was hard to rely on him
for anything. He accepted the postponement of the engagement rather than
fighting for it. He wasn't paying attention to Akane the way he should have
been. He didn't reject Kachiko's attentions with the vehemence he was
supposed to. For that matter, he spent too much time with Kachiko period.
Why couldn't he treat her the way he did Kodachi, or at least Ukyou? Instead
he acted like the time lost girl was being set upon by others, when all they
were trying to do was make Kachiko act normal. Far too often he ended up
taking her side when he should have been on the family's. But that was
Ranma. He didn't think things through and tended to be insensitive. Akane
knew that from the beginning. It's just things would have gone much more
smoothly if he acted responsibly, thought about {is : his} treatment of others, and
stated what he wanted.
Him acting all those ways at once seems a bit contradictory.
Ranma breathed a sigh of relief. The whole day had been weird. First there
was the whole {: problem of} Kachiko flirting with him, which had made him incredibly
uncomfortable. While he had deftly avoided that situation, Akane came along
and asked him to go to the amusement park with her. It seemed odd, since
she had never shown that much of an interest in such places. He didn't want
her to have to go alone, and amusement parks did tend to be kind of fun, so
he agreed. It turned out to be the right choice. He and Akane had a great
time on the rides and stuffing their faces on all the great food. It was
nice to enjoy himself in a non pressure situation where no one was making
any demands of him.
Her attention was fixated on Ranma as she sat down in the seat next to him.
Fearful of losing her nerve, she blurted out, "Ranma, I want to restart the
engagement because I love you and want you to marry me."
In response, Ranma leaped upon the table and began hopping back and forth,
uttering bestial sounds, like he was a monkey.
Akane looked on him in shock. Tearfully she cried out, "You don't have to
make fun of me! All you had to do was say no!" She gave him a solid right,
punching him clear of the table and onto the stage. Tears streaming from her
eyes, she wailed in sorrow, not caring what anyone thought as she ran off
deeper into the amusement park.
I think she took that remarkably well; no major property damage at all.
"No thanks. I don't think I need the lawsoof!" the man grunted someone ran
past, knocking him aside as though he wasn't there. The impact threw him
into the handyman, who grasped out at anything to keep from falling over.
I agree a lawsoof would be pretty serious.
The operator looked up to see that indeed, someone had run into the car. He
tried stopping the wheel {with the controls :}, but all that met him was the
sound of gears giving out.
It was in the middle of the vow that the final bolts connecting the wheel to
the center gave out. The wheel fell to the ground, remaining upright despite
not being attached to anything. Despite not falling far, it made a loud
crash as it hit the earth. It sat there for a moment, motionless. Then
slowly, inexorably, the wheel began rolling, following the downhill grade it
{: had} rested upon.
Bystanders watched in horror as the wheel plummeted over the side. Within
seconds, they heard the crash of metal and plastic as {a ton : tons} of amusement
ride met the rocks below.
Ranma gave a loud "Eep!" in agreement.
Nearly as articulate as I've ever seen him.
The light of realization dawned in Kachiko's eyes, though the light was dim
{in relation : due} to the amount of alcohol she had consumed. "In that case, gimme
one."
He had placed a {shot : tall} glass in front of Kachiko when Kasumi
staggered toward the bar, nearly stumbling into it.
According to the recipes I saw, you serve a Harvey Walbanger in a
collins glass over ice.
"Not really," Kasumi said blissfully, then spotted the {shot glass : drink}. She
pointed in its general direction. "Is that for me?"
"Good." Kasumi picked up the glass and downed the contents in a quick gulp
before Kachiko could prevent her.
"That was mine." Kachiko stared mournfully at the empty vessel.
"Would you like it back?" Kasumi offered.
Very polite of her, as always.
Kachiko accepted another Harvey Wallbanger from the bartender, {drinking : sipping} it
in order to help her consider the matter. "My advice is, if you think
they're hot, knee them in the groin. And if they're ugly, let 'em keep going
as far as you want."
"Thanks. You're always full of wonderful advice." Kasumi headed back toward
the men.
Definitely full.... Though this advice actually seems to work fairly well
to keep Kasumi out of trouble. Hard on the beaux though.
Kachiko slammed her glass down on the counter. "That !#$%! I can't believe
he's hanging all over her, and on television!" She'd show that rotten jerk!
She'd track down some hunky guy and do something with him. She wasn't sure
what, since there was no way she'd let a guy get farther than second base on
a first date, but she'd think of something that was sure to make Ranma a
fountain of jealousy. Maybe introduce the hunk as the father of her child or
something.
A bit tricky if she's not letting him past second base.
Kachiko sniffed disdainfully at the display. "Me and Kasumi were doing some
mother and daughter bondage."
Kachiko watched everyone's reaction to that.
She shook her head clear of the cobwebs for a moment. "Bonding. I mean
bonding. Not bondage. I'm not into that. I'd never do something like that.
Except that one time with... but that's not important right now. But there's
nothing wrong with experimenting. It's healthy. It shows you have an open
mind." She noticed everyone's reaction again. "I think I'd better quit while
I'm behind."
Remarkable wisdom considering how much she's probably drunk.
While Kachiko tried figuring out where she had gone wrong, Kasumi had moved
around her and Akane and walked up to Soun. She smiled and embraced him.
"Good evening, Father."
This might have been an interesting time for her to use her knee. Or possibly
after kissing Ranma.
Uncertain of how to react, Akane just accepted the display of affection. As
Kasumi moved away, Akane noticed her own clothing had taken on a somewhat
alcoholic scent. She {didn't' want to : didn't} know how much one had to drink to cause
that, only that Kachiko was to blame for it.
It took the combined efforts of Kachiko and Akane to pry Kasumi away from
him.
Nice to see them working together for a change.
There it was again! What was with these unusual thoughts regarding the young
man who had been living under her roof all this time. Well, she knew what to
do concerning such impure impulses. It was time for a very cold shower
followed by a very cold bath. That would dispose of her unwanted ardor
quickly enough, and she could return to normal.
Where's mother daughter bondage when you need it?
"Cold water. I need cold water," Kasumi murmured to herself. Her impure
impulses were much stronger and more frequent than usual. She had to take
action fast. As she ran the cold water in the bucket, she lamented the fact
she hadn't found a good man, like her mother had, at her age, and could do
something about those naughty thoughts{: .} Well, technically, her mother hadn't
found a man yet. But she would. Eventually. And it would be Father.
Probably.
"A mole?" Kachiko asked.
I think zit sounded more like something Kachi would say then.
The casual dismissal of her concerns was too much for Kasumi to bear. For
the first time in recent memory, she felt an anger consume her, one that she
didn't even try to fight. Giving in to her impulse, she strode forward,
moving so fast Kachiko didn't have time to react as Kasumi raised her hand
and slapped her mother across the cheek with an open palm, hard enough to
{turning : turn} her face away from her daughter.
With the return of Kasumi's memories, one important fact came to the
forefront, one that made the others that should have troubled her seem
insignificant. Going out had been fun. More fun than she had experienced in
years. She had worn a smile on her face for so long that her cheeks still
felt tired from the overuse of her facial muscles. She had forgotten how
enjoyable it was interacting with men, something she hadn't done since high
school, when she had gotten more than her share of attention. Dancing had
left her breathless and made more muscles ache, but in a good way. Even the
drinking had produced a fairly pleasing effect, allowing her to cast aside
her usual inhibitions and enjoy herself to the fullest without regard as to
what others would think of her (though judging by the painful aftermath, she
could live with a little less pleasure if it meant a little less pain).
Crossover with Sextacular?