The Eternal Lost Lurker wrote:
~~Tee Time~~
Azumanga urination pr0n?
No thank you.
Oh, sorry, thought it was an offer.
"So when you lose to me, I can rub your face in it," Tomo said as though
it
was the most logical thing in the world.
Makes sense.
Yes, but usually people aren't so forward in admitting it.
Yomi sighed, adjusting her glasses. "No, it just means it's played on a
small course and you only use putts."
Or only use putters, and putt with them...
Will rephrase.
~~Birdie~~
Oi, Kagura, stop flipping Tomo off...
Heh. That could have been another line
A quintet of girls lined up at the first tee at the miniature golf
course,
waiting patiently with clubs and balls in hand.
*starts to say something*
...nah, too easy.
Yeah, just let it go. Too obligatory.
"We should start without her," Tomo suggested as she took mighty
practice
swings with her club, nearly swatting all everyone around her.
Unnecessary "all" there.
droppd
Osaka suddenly appeared. She was wearing plaid pants, a fuchsia and pink
sweater, a yellow cap with a purple tassel on top, and a bore a small
cup
in
her hand.
Extra "a" before "bore".
dropped
The girls' eyes bulged so wide at the sight their orbs nearly fell out
of
their heads.
Awkward wording...suggest replacing "their orbs" with simply "they".
Yeah, reworded that a great deal.
Osaka looked down at her clothing. "I told my dad I was going to play
golf,
and he bought this outfit for me. He plays golf and seemed to think you
had
to wear something like this to play."
XD
I've seen people in similar ensembles. It never gets any easier.
"And why do you have a cup?" Sakaki asked.
Osaka looked down at it. "You said to show up for tea time. This is my
tea.
Where's yours, or did you already drink it?"
*falls over laughing*
This is Osaka. :)
Tomo shot her a pitiful glare. "I watched some golf on television today.
The
announcers said one of the golfers won the game when he hit a birdie."
*FACEFAULT*
And this is a conceivable misunderstanding... for someone like Tomo. :)
score, right?" Tomo asked.
"No!" Yomi snatched the club out of Tomo's hands and thumped her in the
head
with it.
Ah, the traditional Stick of Enlightement.
Heh
"What are you doing? The ball was right on the edge," Chiyo called out.
Osaka said, "It was too close. I have to hit the ball in on the fourth
stroke. It says so on the scorecard."
Yep, that's typical Osaka logic.
Thanks. Glad it made sense.
"Well, she's... thoughtful," Sakaki said.
The others just sighed as Osaka sank the ball.
Heh.
Have cut the 'others' bit and have gone with 'Sakaki said as Osaka sank the
ball.'
ball altogether. To make things more difficult, the cat's paw dangled
over
the edge of the house in front of the holes. It moved back and forth at
regular intervals, alternating which hole it blocked at any one time.
I *hate* those stupid things >_<
They are tricky
so.
The tall girl repeated the action, cat batting the ball away a third and
then fourth time.
Even MECHANICAL cats are out to get poor Sakaki.... ;_;
Nah. She's intentionally hitting it to hear it meow.
Sakaki looked at the cat, then blushed even more. "Ah, I'd rather stay
and
keep trying. You guys can play in front of me. I don't mind going last.
I'll
catch up to you later."
*SNRK*
Much later, like when the meow part malfunctions and stops making noise.
Chiyo's stared worriedly at the next hole. This one was the most
difficult
Don't need that apostrophe-s...
dropped
yet. It had the longest, most twisty path, a rotating windmill that
could
block the ball's path, a narrow bridge over a stream, and the hole could
only be reached by bouncing the ball just right off a rubber bumper.
You have to wonder what kind of crack the designers of minigolf courses
abuse...
Had to come up with something I guess.
The ball was hit firmly but not too powerfully. It followed the twisty
bath
to the windmill,
eliciting a shout of "EEK! PERVERTED BALL!" from the girls therein...
'path' then
Yomi lowered her shoulder and ran right into Tomo, knocking her off the
green and into some shrubs lining the hole.
"There is now," Yomi said satisfactorily.
*snrk*
Leave it to Yomi to change the way the game is played.
The others nodded their heads in agreement.
"That's stupid!" Tomo pouted and stomped off
I get the feeling this is a setup for another gag...
yep.
"I request we switch over to a golf grading scale whereby the lowest
score
is in fact the best."
"Request denied. Now sit down in your seat and if you must cry, do it
quietly. I have a hangover."
Tomo sat down and moaned, "It's not that I'm dumb, it's just that the
scoring systems are always off in relation to the points I make."
I was right. ^_^
It's a philosophical moment for her. And it is true for far too many people
much of the time. :(
[End notes] And here endth the fic. Like I said, not one of my stronger
efforts, but there's so little Azumanga fanfiction out there, I didn't
think
a weaker one would hurt it.
It was cute. Good work. ^_^
Thanks, though I still think it's weaker than most of the other Azu fics I
did.
Thanks for the comments.
DB Sommer
--------------------------------------
The Eternal Lost Lurker
www.lurkerdrome.com
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