And one more in two halves:

"You know, when two people who love each other go to Todai
together, they'll live happily ever after. Let's meet there when we
grow older, okay? Can you do that, Kei-kun?"

Boy, he really bungled that one.

I really ought to write my take on this someday.

"It's okay, Keitaro. The girls and I have discussed this
beforehand," Naru whispered, her voice dripping with honey.

Naru: We're going to make sure you wake up before you get to the really good
part of the dream.

The threat of the nosebleed immediately vanished as Keitaro's
body rerouted the flow of his blood and directed it towards his lower
extremities.

On other words, his toes swelled to a tremendous size.

Keitaro froze as his aunt, wearing next to nothing, crawled on
top of him and whispered into his ear.

"Don't worry, I'll be gentle."

*****

"Noooooo!"

Haruka: Then I'll be rough. (She suddenly appears in leather chaps and a
whip)

Kitsune pouted. "I don't want to. It's mine! You can't
have it."

He needs to spank her to make her tow the line. :)

 Shinobu woke up feeling refreshed, excited about facing the

new day.

That should end soon.

Things were different now. Her sempai, Keitaro, had given her
a new perspective on life. He taught her tackle the challenges of life
head-on. He was really amazing.

amazingly stupid. Compared to the self inflicted hell he made his life,
Shinobu was not only relatively normal, but had it pretty easy.

"Onward, Keitaro! Together, we shall capture that fleeing fox
and tie her up so that we may visit unspeakable acts upon her person!
Then, all our enemies will learn to fear the partnership of Urashima
and Su!"

Ha! Great scene, and perfect. Su. LH was a terrible predicticble cliche
plot, but at least most of the characters shined and made it interesting.

Kitsune ran like she had never run before in her life. In her
right hand, she held the yardstick that Keitaro wanted to take from
her. Why hadn't she thought of doing this before? This was way better
than lying around and watching TV.

"Stop running and give me that yardstick!"

Because she's not really energetic by nature.

Left alone, Kitsune stared blankly at the hallway. There,
just moments ago, Keitaro had been ensnared by Su's newest invention
as he ran towards her. The mechanical handcuffs flew right past her,
somehow managing to hit Keitaro's legs before clamping shut, causing
him to fall and roll across the floor, driven by his momentum.

Not really surprised by that.

With practiced ease, Motoko pulled her sword out of its
scabbard in order to punish Keitaro with one of her secret sword
techniques. As she did so, the top half of the sword snapped off and
fell to the floor with a loud clang. The two of them watched it
bounce once and skid towards a wall before coming to a stop.

Oops

Motoko grabbed Keitaro by his neck and lifted him an inch off
the floor. "Fix my sword with _glue_? Is this your idea of a joke?"

Keitaro: No, but using a sword as flimsy as that was a pretty good joke on
your part.

"It's done, and Motoko-chan isn't back yet! Yatta!"

Keitaro jumped with joy, holding Motoko's newly repaired
sword in his right hand. The glue had worked wonderfully, just as he'd
hoped. His day had started horribly, but it looked like his luck was
finally coming around. With Motoko's sword fixed, he wouldn't have
to endure another one of her sword techniques.

Umm, actually with her sword broken, he wouldn't have had to endure them.Now
that it's fixed, he does. :)

Keitaro examined the weapon, looking for any magical runes or
inscriptions that might have been carved into the blade.

Yeah, the magical blade that breaks on impact. :)

Motoko's sister chuckled at her words. "My dear sister, this
is but one of many human forms that my husband can assume. His true
identity is that of Leonardo, a teenage mutant ninja turtle!"

.....

You know, meeting the TMNT would be something that would send Motoko over
the deep end.

Forgetting that she had a sword in her anger, Motoko picked
up a piece of wood lying on the floor and started repeatedly striking
Keitaro with it. While her attacks did not succeed in getting him
to let go of her, they did wake him up rather quickly.

What a freak. Being clubbed with a hunk of wood usually knocks people out.
:)

Motoko closed her eyes in defeat. "Tell me, Urashima, does
it look anything like dried glue?"

Heh. Now we have the reason behind the title. Very nice. I can actually see
something as silly as this happening to him.

 Motoko nodded her head in reply to Keitaro's query. "Of course

I'm not angry. You're not the one at fault here. If anything, I should
be the one to apologize. After all, it was I who startled you and lost
my balance."

Keitaro, not used to anyone apologizing for beating on him, passed out.

Motoko grinned at him. "Yes, honor. I know that we may have
had our differences in the past, Urashima-san, but deep down I've
always held you in high regard. You are a man of honor, Urashima. You
are intelligent, brave, and always willing to make sacrifices for the
greater good."

Oh, I see. He's going to have to sacrifice something for her.

Keitaro didn't like the sound of that. "Er... sacrifices?"

Motoko was quick to reply. "Of course. Sacrifices. Like now,
for instance. Surely you can see that the only way to resolve this
situation is to chop off your hand!"

Keitaro: Why don't we chop off part of your ass instead? You've got plenty
to spare, after all.

Motoko: Die!

"Please stop, Motoko-chan! This isn't necessary! I know
where we can get help!"

It's in part 2.

DB Sommer

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