Stars My Destination

Is the title "Stars" or "Start" My Destination? Because you've got it two
different ways here.

The ship left a long graceful tail of exhaust as it
roared off the launch pad and into the sky. The ship
flew higher and high into the blue sky and within
minutes it vanished from view, off into the great
black of space.

That's not a very good phrase there, at the end.

Spaceport. His back against a tree and his hands
behind his head, the young outlaw sat and starred at

stared

"Ah ha! I figured this is where you are. I've been

Check your tenses. "figured" and "are" don't go together.

"Whoa, hold up!" interrupted Gene. "By Kingpins you
don't mean that bowling ally do you?

alley

The look of irritation on Jim's face grew. "I was
planning on getting on the net and trying to find some
info on how these machines work. If we have some idea
of what we're dealing with it'll save us a lot of
hassle and time and make easier to get that bonus.
Gene made an amused noise. "Since when does 'Genius'

Just as a note--you really need to do something to mark off paragraphs.
Either indent or doublespace.

"I'm honored to be allowed to bask in your brilliance,
Prof. Hawking," replied Gene with exaggerated

Don't use abbreviations like this in the middle of a sentence. Write out the
word "Professor".

The boy game a little smile and nodded. "Yeah, it is."

gave

"Heck, Peter Pan himself even said 'To doe would be a

die, maybe?


Anyway, decent enough story.

==============================
"Capitalization is the difference between
 'I helped my uncle Jack off a horse' and
 'I helped my uncle jack off a horse'."
==============================
The Eternal Lost Lurker
(This space for rent)
www.lurkerdrome.com



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