David Dee wrote:

Well, I read this a while back, and

Prologue

Manabu and Kobashi exited the bar, feeling pretty
damn good about themselves as they leaned against
one another in a drunken stupor.

Ahh.  Quality people.

Actually, I think I know these guys.

Violent thugs that enjoy drinking, eh? Interesting crowd you hang out with/

a painful way. Likewise, the men's reputation as
members of one of the most violent local street
gangs meant no one would tell them to keep it down.
The men might meet the request halfway by ripping
the person's ear off so they wouldn't have to hear
the racket.

Considerate of them.

In their own way.

"Who can't use more of them?"

Kobashi considered that. "Rich gay guys."

Hey, as David Geffen could doubtless tell them, even
rich gay guys can always use more money.

While people will often bandy about the term (usually refering to someone 
else) that someone has 'enough' money, they can't seem to give an actual 
dollar amount to it, and what factors determine why it's that amount.

"I saw something over there. Let's check it out."

"Hey--look!  Gravestones with our names on them!"

One of the guys is about to become his own gravestone. :)

The two headed down the dead-end alley, the alcohol
in their system making them feel invincible.

As well as convicing them they were incredibly
handsome, intelligent, and articulate.  And great
company.

Ah, like me then. I see, I see.

black stocking clad legs. Tall thigh high green
boots completed the ensemble.

Gee, wonder who that is? ;-)

the She Beast it isn't. :)

The woman was such a beauty she stopped both men in
their tracks. Each of them felt an animalistic urge
deep in their souls as they stared at her.

"Hey, Kobashi--you suddenly want to circle a wooly
mammoth for some reason?"

Sorry.  Couldn't help myself.

Heh

The woman spoke in a throaty purr. "I see thou hast
impeccable taste when it comes to beauty. However,
there is but one of myself and two of
thee. Perhaps it would behoove thee to discuss
amongst thyselves who is the more worthy of my
attentions."

Okay, technically, 'thyself' is singular.  But then
again, this isn't Shakespeare--it's a Lee-style
Shakespeare-riff.

It's Asgardian, which only bares a faint resembalnce to Shakespere

A haze came over the men's eyes as she spoke to
them. The two lifelong friends turned on one
another, snarling and attacking, neither holding
anything back. They were like two rabid dogs locked
in a life and death struggle as they pummeled each
other ruthlessly.

For some people, this would have been remarkable.  For
Kobashi and Manabu, it was Saturday.

Heh

Seeing a victor emerge, the woman walked up to him
and purred, "Thou art victorious, mine champion. Now

come, and allow myself to bestow upon thee the favor

one such as yourself deserves."

Oh, that CAN'T be a set up... :-D

we have to intro her attitude and abilities somehow. This was just a useful 
way of doing it.

Urd laughed to herself as she strode from the alley,
leaving the statue of Wataru Kobashi behind.

Yep.  One ironic fate, fit to order.  Well, it
couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.

That's the idea. I didn't want her to come off as a complete bitch.

She indicated that the men should follow. Every one
of them did so, surrounding her as they openly
basked in her presence. The women in the gym were
left to stare in disbelief at what had happened.

Wow.  Either her magic is more powerful than she
realizes or she hit one of the only straights-only
workout clubs in the world...

Actually the spell is gender specfic. It works on all men that can see her, 
straight or not. It won't work on women, lesbian or not.

Business at the furniture store was down, and she
needed the commission.  Circus performer or
eccentric millionaire, money was money, no matter
who was giving it to you.

Oh, I don't know about that...

Ringmaster: "You will give me a sofa of rich
Corinthian leather for five hundred down, and no
interest for eight months!"

Princess Python:  "You know, we could just steal
it..."

Ringmaster: "Silence, whelp!  There is a--style to
these things!"

Heh. True.

They were quickly at the woman's side, obeying her
in ways Kaori was envious of.

Kaori: "I want to be the one who decides who lives and
who dies, damn it!"

Not quite that bad.

She vowed that as soon as the current crisis was
over, she'd be phoning her Uncle Peter in the United

States. He dealt with SPBs all the time on behalf of

the government. He'd tell her what to do to bring
this scum, human and mutant alike, into line.

Something tells me it will involve large clunky
robots...

We should find out next chapter, if my outline holds true.

and bras were actually pretty comfortable, but it
felt awkward. At least she wasn't some top heavy
tart, like that Elektra bitch. Having a chest that
large would have driven her crazy. As it was,
she thought her breasts were shaped just fine. Not
too big, and definitely manageable. They were the
ideal size. It was just their notable presence that
threw her off.

I was trying to think of some way to convey my
feelings on that last passage, but really, I don't
think the proper words actually exist. So, allow me to
say--brilliant...

Thanks. Since Ukyou doesn't do the 'girl thing' often, I thought it would be 
a neat twist to see her mental processes in adapting.

red glows that emanated from slits where the
figure's eyes should be. The helmet was so wide it
sat flush with the shoulders of the armor, making it

appear the figure had no neck. Two tiny horns bent
upward from the brim of the helmet. Between that and

the crimson glows, it gave the figure a demonic
appearance.

Gee, wonder who THAT is...? ;-)

The Stinger. (A lame villain that took out all the Avengers at one time.)

Ukyou was in the middle of the one involving rope, a
chair, and a feather duster, when she heard the
teacher call her name.

Hmmm.  I thought these were revenge fantasies...

It is. Now you just have to use your imagination as to how you torture 
someone with the above items. :)

"At least he didn't ask for her measurements this
time," a girl toward the front grumbled.

Daisuke: "Hey!  When you say it that way, of course it
sounds bad!" *back to Ukyou, in an attempted suave
voice*  "But seriously, for me, the most erotic part
of a woman is the boobies..."

Heh.

"Yeah, that's the one. I think he controls hawks."

And somewhere, Sam Wilson cries...

He had physical skills that more than make up for the lame power schtick.

"No, it's not hawks. He uses boomerangs with gadgets

in them."

And somewhere, Fred Myers cries...

"No, it's an energy sword."

And somewhere, half of the characters created in the
80s and Dane Whitman cry...

Yeah, sword bearing heroes that don't kill are difficult to deal with.

She held nothing but hatred for Ranma, and
he had the audacity to make her feel gratitude
toward him.

That bastard. :-D

Ukyou: It's even more motivation for me to seek vengeance.

The whole room gasped, including Ranma, who just
stared at Ukyou in befuddlement.

In addition to gaping, I may gather.

Yeah, I rephrased that, since it's contradictory.

Better to have too much firepower on a false alarm,
like their confrontation with Leap Frog (whose sole
power was bouncing around on a pair of springs in
his frog costume),

Is his son trying to redeem the mantle as the Fabulous
Frog-Man yet?

No. Thankfully.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mousse stopped 'reading' the Braille law books he
was perusing for an upcoming test and temporarily
turned off the audio signal on his card.

Just wondering--are you aware that mainstream
Daredevil can read even non-Braille books with his
fingers?

Yeah, but he's doing this to keep up apperances.

What was it about life that she kept ending up in
situations where she felt like crying?

Urrr... that IS life, I'm afraid...

*Sigh* So true.

It wasn't like any other Asgardians would dare defy
the All-Father's Imperial Edict.

Except for Loki.  And maybe the Executioner.  And
Hela, her too...

Yes, but she doesn't know that at this time. And actually it was Sif, and 
not Hela, who's done that

Satana Satanadana (Urd still wondered how that could

be pronounced 'Mara')

Aren't we all?

But it's a fun running gag

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Daredevil felt a sense of pride that he was better
than so many of his fellow Avengers. One of these
days he'd prove it to the annoying egotist, Captain
Japan.

As opposed to himself, of course, the likeable
egotist.

Just ask him. He'll tell you he's humble
.

No one could control his mind, no matter what their
powers were.

Unless they had a method that wasn't the slightest bit
vision-based of course.  Then he was in trouble.

Yep. Siren type, perhaps.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

After conjuring a minor wind to blow away the haze,
the Enchantress turned a bemused smile upon the
warrior.

Was her smile "bewildered" or "lost in thought"?

I'm sorry--it's just that everyone uses this one wrong
and it bugs the hell out of me.

Will changed

That probably wasn't the best of recourses, since
some exiles not only survived those harsh realms,
but they would found their own kingdoms in those
places of exile, and then raised armies to seek
revenge on Asgard. While Asgard always won, there
was usually a feeling of irritation when some
criminal turned their punishment to their advantage.

When asked why he continued to do it, Odin generally
coughed something about "destiny" and changed the
subject.

Odin: Verily, tis always Destiny afoot in such matters.

"I have decided I am the Realm Eternal's Executioner

and that's that!" The figure strode forward, hammer
held menacingly before it.

"So, nyah!"

Pretty much, indicating what her true appearance might be

Rather, at long last the name of Skuld shall be on
everyone's lips as the greatest of gods, while the
Thunder's name will be quickly forgotten, like some
god I cannot name, since they be forgotten."

In another dimension, Laritides, God of Negotiable
Real Estate glanced up.  "Did anybody feel a chill?"

There probably was at one time. No wonder everyone forgot him.

The Anti-Mjolnir 3005 shattered into a hundred
pieces,

Wait a minute... wasn't that the Mjolnir 3005?

This is a case of changing something and missing one of them. It was going 
to be Anti, then I changed my mind.

Curious as to what such a powerful, belligerent
warrior must look like, Hawkeye turned to look at
him, wagering he resembled a giant ape in human

form.

That's actually a pretty good description of Skurge.
I love Kirby's work, but subtlety was never his strong
point--his good guys look good, and his bad guys look
bad.  Which is both his limitation, and his strength.

You know what you're getting.

A girl fell out of the hole in the bottom of the
armor, landing solidly on her behind.

Hee.  I was expecting that.

It was the more obvious of the choises. I don't think i want to see 
body-building Skuld.

An excellent chapter which sets up a nice mystery that
I expect you're going to explore later.  Brilliant work.

Yep. Thor/Akane's memory problems have been hinted at it. This is simply 
more fuel to that subplot. Next chapter we should work on several others as 
well.

Thanks for all the help. It's really appreciated.

DB Sommer 



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